Mystery Reader writes: “I had cake for breakfast then more cake for second breakfast. First piece was on a plate, like someone with a shred of dignity. Second piece was eaten out of my hand, like an animal (or someone who has 2 pieces of cake before 11 am). Also, don’t look at the top of my pad. It is painful.”
Hey reader! This is a judge-free zone. We won’t call you an animal for eating two pieces of cake. However, we do need to talk about your pad. That shit WILL. NOT. STAND. Those raggedy edges are forcing me to breathe into a paper bag to calm down. I am not a neatnik, we know this. But that pad is like a giant zit that’s demanding to be popped. I hate raggedy paper edges. And also messy container openings. A mayonnaise jar with a goopy rim? Disgusting! A ketchup kid with crusties inside? Barf.